Featured

Key Factors to Consider While Selecting Wedding Venues

Wedding VenuesBefore starting your inquiry, take the time to rundown the most critical things you have to have set up for the venue to be a good fit for you. Additionally it’s a smart thought to make a ‘list of things to get’ that is a rundown of every last one of things you would truly love, things that would make the wedding venue great, as well as great.

For the vast majority these are the 7 key features to take a gander at.

1. Venue Size

In a perfect world, it’s extraordinary to have a smart thought of what number of individuals will be going to your wedding, before you begin seeking. Knowing this one thing will spare you a ton of seeking time by promptly deciding out wedding venues that are whichever too huge or excessively little. You’ll see that all accomplished venues will have an exceptionally exact number identifying with the quantity of individuals they can take – however this will contrast relying upon whether you plan a take a seat supper or a stand-up mixed drink party.

2. Wedding Venue Location

Where you hold the wedding can be dictated by various things. Case in point, if the vast majority of your visitors are originating from interstate, or away, it may not be an issue the length of there is some place close-by for them to sit tight. A few couples love the thought of keeping it all up close and personal, in order to stay away from to much driving around on the day. Then again, on the off chance that you have chosen a specific kind of wedding venue, for example, a shoreline wedding, then this will decrease the quantity of conceivable areas instantly.

3. Does the Venue have Accommodation?

A few couples have thought that it was attractive to discover a wedding venue that can oblige the wedding visitors for the night. This is an awesome option, as it makes it less demanding for visitors to unwind furthermore not need to stress over the amount they are drinking on the grounds that they don’t need to drive.

4. Conceivable outcomes at venue

Do you need a congregation wedding or will you be searching for wedding venues that can oblige a common function and also a gathering? When you are going by wedding venues verify you take a gander at the room where the function will happen and in addition the gathering range. You may go gaga for the venue all in all; however the service room needs to feel truly exceptional for the ideal wedding day.

5. Cooking

It’s critical to verify you get some information about catering. For instance;

Do you need to utilize the venues caterers or would you be able to get your own?
On the off chance that its a prerequisite to utilize the venues own food providers, what is the estimating structure?
What is incorporated in the cost?
Do they cater for individuals with hypersensitivities and for exceptional consuming needs, in the same way as vegans?
Shouldn’t we think about beverages? Could they be incorporated or does it need to be a money bar?
What beverages do they serve?
What amount of are the beverages bundles, and what do they incorporate?

6. Wedding Venue Layout

As you begin going to different wedding venues, consider the sort of format that will best suit what you have as a main priority. There are a few choices. Might you want to have the tables put around the move floor with the goal that the moving can begin early and proceed all through the gathering or do you like to have it all gathered up so moving can begin after the conventions and sustenance are done with?

7. Wedding Photo’s

Wedding photos are an imperative approach to record and recall your exceptional day. Numerous individuals pick wedding venues with awesome photographic ranges so the wedding photograph’s can be taken in situ, without needing to go somewhere else. There are numerous wedding venues that have uncommon ranges made particularly for this reason, so verify you look at them!

Featured

Buy Luxury Engagement Rings for Women

Wedding RingAn engagement ring holds the most important position in the jewellery collections for women. It represents a promise that need to be treasured, and is a lifelong symbol of love to be shown to others and accepted. You might be looking for a pretty ring for a surprise proposal or you could be searching with your special someone. Either way, you will hit upon what you’re searching for in our splendid collection of engagement rings for women. If you believe treating yourself while shipping for ring, check out our grand jewellery collection to find your best jewellery piece.

When looking for the special person in your life, it is not really something that you can do without any specific planning. The ring is one of the most significant elements of the proposal so browse through our vast range of diamond engagement rings with several renowned brands included to find an ideal ring for your perfect partner.

Today, Emma Parker & Co. is the leading quality jeweller worldwide, offering quality engagement rings for woman. We love what we do and are always committed to facilitate our customers with the best quality diamonds and diamond jewellery sets. Our competent team is skilled at helping you find and keep enticing jewellery you’ll treasure forever. Our passion for fine jewellery has been nothing short of an impeccable love affair. We are proud of our reputation for exacting standards and exceptional quality, and our zeal for fine diamond jewellery has been nothing short of a love affair. The pursuit of brilliance is simply part of our culture as a family business. Our expertise and passion has been passed down through generations, and is still the key focus of how we accomplish things today.

Round Halo Engagement RingSince inception, we have been privileged and proud to play a part in some of the most significant moments in your lives. We have been part of your weddings, engagements, birthdays and christenings, and this is at the spirit of why we love what we do. We believe that selecting the jewellery for your special occasion is part of the most significant moment itself, and that’s why we make it our goal to make sure that each and every client has a magnificent experience every time they choose Emma Parker & Co.

Browse through our grand selection of round halo engagement ring and make your love flourish. We are always there to assist you in your mission.

Featured

Are your companions harming your relationship?

Harming RelationshipCouples who need support from others frequently feel segregated and less fulfilled by their relationship. Regardless of how solid your marriage or relationship may appear, you and your accomplice can profit by having a solid relationship-bolster system. Find why you ought to begin fabricating a relationship-emotionally supportive network today.

You exist inside of a web of connections. For example, if your companion is experiencing extreme times, you might wind up feeling an enthusiastic greatness for the duration of the day, considering your companion. As this hues your disposition, your accomplice might begin to notice that of late you’ve been distracted and down. Since feelings are infectious, this will affect your accomplice somehow and her/his collaborations with others might now be diverse as an aftereffect of what your companion imparted to you.

Continue reading “Are your companions harming your relationship?”

Featured

How does wedding registry work

Wedding RegistryPlanning a wedding is really difficult, but nowadays, the evolution of technology gives you the possibility to use its perks to your favour. Besides the online scheduling, appointment booking and so on, there are nowadays many websites with wedding registry ideas that you can use to ease your job. You may wonder which the added value these bring to the wedding industry is, but if you look carefully, you will realise they are actually extremely efficient. Since most of them also provide online stores, so that people can purchase directly what they need, using them for wedding gift registry ideas is the main benefit. Taking into consideration that nowadays, most of the couples move in together before the wedding, offering them presents at their wedding is very useful for their future life: pieces of furniture, wall art, antique items or uncommon house accessories – all these will help them decorate their house once they begin a new life. They are the ones who know exactly what they need and an online store and registry platform can be the best options both for them and their guests, who will know for sure they will not fail while buying a present.

These registry pages are very user friendly, and anybody can access them. All you have to do is choose the field where you want to, and make a list of all the things you would like to receive. The gift registry is extremely easy to launch and simple to use. The first thing you have to do is visit the page and create an account on the service provider website, then log in and go to the section dedicated to creating a registry, where you have to complete an application form consisting in some details about yourself. Some platforms also give you the possibility to customize your account, by adding pictures or whatever you want, to make it look a bit more personal. After you save all the changes, you can start looking on the online store for things you like or need, and add whatever you would like to have on your list. You will not only feel amazing, because you will have an online shopping session, but also excited, knowing that you will actually receive all those things without having to pay for them. After you decide upon a series of items, you can share the link to all the people who will attend the wedding, so that they have plenty of wedding gift registry ideas to choose from. Once they decide to attend the event and to buy something for you, the software will automatically show that item as already bought, so that you will not receive similar, or why not, the same present many times.

Besides this, you can even prioritize the gifts you want, thus offering even more hints to the guests, in terms of what presents they should buy. This new planning method is extremely useful, because it makes it easier for the guests to choose something according to your needs and taste. Furthermore, it will help anyone avoid an awkward situation, in which you get the same gift twice.

Featured

Top Reasons Why Relationships Break Down

BreakdownYet regardless of the best of endeavors, connections do break. Here are the top reasons why connections don’t last. Betrayal No individual will acknowledge and acknowledge unfaithfulness. Treachery acros…

Yet notwithstanding the best of endeavors, connections do break. Here are the top reasons why connections don’t last.

Unfaithfulness

No person will acknowledge and acknowledge unfaithfulness. Disloyalty crosswise over both the genders is dealt with as a noteworthy turn off. Case in point previous US president Bill Clinton’s celebrated throw with his secretary

Continue reading “Top Reasons Why Relationships Break Down”

Featured

How To Forgive An Affair And Strengthen Your Relationship

ForgiveIt’s so difficult to forget an undertaking, you have to figure out how. Couple of occasions throughout your life will be as destroying as discovering that your accomplice has been undermining you. One of the principal choices you will hav…

It’s so difficult to excuse an undertaking, you have to figure out how. Couple of occasions throughout your life will be as crushing as discovering that your accomplice has been undermining you. One of the principal choices you will need to make is whether to separate or stick it out – however in the event that you choose to stay together and attempted to make it work, you might discover your relationship much more grounded and secure therefore.

Remember That You’re Not to Blame.

It might be that something you did added to your accomplice’s choice to cheat, yet in the last examination recollect that it was your accomplice, and not you, who embraced such unsafe conduct, and it can’t be faulted for you. You can’t be pummeling yourself over this – the way that your accomplice strayed doesn’t mean you’re a terrible individual. You muse excuse yourself before considering pardoning your accomplice.

Try not to Use This as Ammunition

You’re not at blame, but rather in the event that you believe you’re going to throw the issue in your accomplice’s face each time you too have a contradiction, then you’ll really be more in charge of the demise of the relationship than the undertaking was. You know things that make your accomplice feel awful – do you always convey them up to perpetrate torment? So why might you need to keep raising the issue of the undertaking?

Reach Your Feelings

It’s not going to be anything but difficult to overlook your accomplice’s issue, yet before you even attempt, you must get over those underlying sentiments of selling out and torment. As the specialist says, where does it hurt? Is it true that you are feeling humiliates and embarrassed, or sold out and furious? On the other hand practically everything? This is the best time to express every one of your feelings and comprehend all of them.

Once more, don’t utilize this as a reason to accuse your accomplice or search for vital point of preference in future contentions. Investigate your own feelings, yet don’t center fault. The sort of feelings you’re feeling are really solid, and there’s nothing amiss with shouting, or crying. You’ll move beyond that underlying response at some point or another.

Right now, you’ll have the capacity to reflect all the more obviously and focus on the things you can do to forget your accomplice as opposed to just respond to the issue.

Take a seat Together and Talk Things Through

You have to do it, and it will be among the more troublesome things you’ve ever done, yet despite everything you must do it. With your accomplice – and just your accomplice – have a legitimate discussion about the reason for the treachery. Such things that cause so much torment are hard to talk about, yet you won’t have the capacity to develop as a couple unless you’ve done as such.

Talk about – serenely – what created the undertaking. Knowing how each of you felt about what the other was doing might help you to be more chivalrous of each other later on. How could you have been able to you feel about the undertaking when you got some answers concerning it? How did your accomplice feel? There’s doubtlessly it’s difficult to hear reality. Blame dispensing, pointing the finger at each other and for the most part acting youthful aren’t going to benefit both of you in any way.

There’s an old saying: “You can be correct, or you can be glad.” It’s anything but difficult to continue playing the casualty card, yet it’s much harder to recognize those of your inadequacies that might have added to the issue, and to work to right them. These are some to the components of good correspondence – not simply raising your voice louder and louder until you’re sure your accomplice heard you.

Construct Yourself a Relationship that is too Good for an Affair

Advancing is the following stride of your arranging, however strictly when you and your accomplice have completely examined the issue. Two basic things you have to build up are approaches to enhance your correspondence, and how to maintain a strategic distance from the circumstances that hinted at the issue. You can’t simply submit now to the relationship; you must focus on enhancing it.

Few difficulties imperil a relationship as much as duping, and figuring out how to overlook it is additionally a test. It relies on upon your dedication, yet in the event that you’re both willing, you can work to construct another future – and another past – together. Beyond any doubt it’ll take some time and there’ll be some agonizing minutes along the wayArticle Search, yet your confidence in each other can be restored and you can chip away at making tomorrow’s recollections.

Featured

How to attract

AttractEveryone in this world needs to lead a musical holding every through hey life. What’s more, why not? Each body must consider driving an existence loaded with concordance and warmth. We live just once so we should live…

Everyone in this world needs to lead a sweet holding every through greetings life. Also, why not? Each body must consider driving an existence loaded with concordance and fondness. We live just once so we should live it joyfully without troubling others or letting others to trouble us. Be that as it may, as we all know we are overwhelmed administered by our decision planet-The 12 Zodiac Signs. Our identities, characters, activities, identity and a considerable measure numerous things can be judged by our twelve zodiac signs. Similarly our zodiac signs help us to in a perfect world pick our accomplice, how we pull in them and how are we pulled in towards them. A Greek word, Zodiac is only a circle of creatures out of which 8 speak to creatures as their sign and a particular area of these creatures in the sky is Zodiac sign.

Continue reading “How to attract”

Featured

4 Commonly Overlooked Ways To Make A Relationship Work

RelationshipAfter some time all connections will endure some high and low focuses. Typically when two individuals first social gathering they are to a great degree glad to associate with each other. Be that as it may, at last there will regularly.

After some time all connections will endure some high and low focuses. Typically when two individuals first social affair they are amazingly cheerful to associate with each other. Be that as it may, at last there will consistently be some harsh times with any relationship. There are 4 essential components in keeping a relationship going in troublesome times, which you can make work for you on the off chance that you need to.

Continue reading “4 Commonly Overlooked Ways To Make A Relationship Work”

Featured

Romantic Love: Is it More than Just Biology?

Some believe that you can influence whether or not one can influence a feeling of love through integrative nutrition?

We teach integrative nutrition at our distance learning school but at the core of all healing instruction is love. Even before  biology

Biological models of love tend to see love as a mammalian drive, just like hunger. Psychology theory defines love as more of a social and cultural phenomenon. There are probably elements of truth in both views — certainly love is influenced by hormones (such as dopamine ), and how people think and behave in love is influenced by their conceptions of love.

The conventional view in biology is that there are two major drives in love – “sexual attraction”  and attachment. Attachment between adults is presumed to work on the same principles that lead an infant to become attached to its mother. The traditional psychological view sees love as being a combination of companionate love and passionate love. Passionate love is intense longing, and is often accompanied by physiological arousal (shortness of breath, rapid heart rate). Companionate love is affection and a feeling of intimacy not accompanied by physiological arousal.

Studies have shown that brain scans of those in infatuated by love display a resemblance to those with a mental illness. Love creates activity in the same area of the brain that hunger, thirst, and drug cravings create activity in. New love, therefore, could possibly be more physical than emotional. Over time, this reaction to love mellows, and different areas of the brain are activated, primarily ones involving long-term commitments.

Love styles

John Alan Lee identified six basic theories that people use in their interpersonal relationships: Eros — a passionate physical love based on physical appearance

Ludus — love is played as a game; love is playful

Storge— an affectionate love that slowly develops, based on similarity.

Pragma— pragmatic love

Mania — highly emotional love; unstable; the stereotype of romantic love

Agape— selfless altruistic love; spiritual

Psychologist Robert Sternberg created a “triangular theory of love and presents the idea that love is a trilogy of three different components: intimacy, commitment, and passion.

• Intimacy is a form by which two people can share secrets and various details of their personal lives. Intimacy is usually shown in friendships and romantic love affairs.

• Commitment, on the other hand, is the expectation that the relationship is going to last forever. The last and most common form of love is

• Passion: This the most common of the three and is usually expressed as sexual attraction and passion. Passionate love is shown in infatuation as well as romantic love.

In the end the ability to love authentically is the path to greater freedom, happiness and abundance.

Featured

11 Ways to Deal with the Negative People Around You

Negative PeopleNegative people are everywhere. You cannot expect everyone to have the kind of positive outlook in life and attitude as you do. They just come out and then start ruining your life. Although some aren’t aware that they have negative personalities, others meanwhile are purely mean and awful. One unfortunate thing about negative people is that you can never avoid them. In fact, they are all around you. So the best thing for you to do is to try not to avoid them, instead find ways to deal with them.

One common trait for this kind of individuals is that they love to mess up a good and positive conversation. They either love or superficially don’t understand that they are making other people around them depressed and disappointed.  While you may want to completely get out of their way, it simply isn’t possible especially when most of them are close to you, like for instance, your relative, friend, roommate, neighbor, or officemate. Thus, the best remedy for you is to learn these 11 ways to deal with negative people around you.

Determining the Cause

People who have negative personalities are not born that way. They develop this kind of attitude because of a certain cause. So if you want to know how to properly deal with them, you must understand, dig deep, and find out what caused them to transform. Is it because of a recent problem or issue, an abusive past, or perhaps a behavioral disorder? You have to learn from them in order to deal with them.

Opposite Poles Attract

Negative people are seen that way because they always attract or go near the opposite minded individuals. If you are a happy, contented, and generally good attitude person, then you are likely to become a subject of interest by negative people. In order to deal with them the right way, you must not go down to their level. Always maintain a positive vibe and attitude and don’t push them!

Try Hard Not to Argue

People who are so negative when it comes to how they see others are very good at what they do, and that is to frustrate, disappoint, and put others on the brink of emotionally heating up. If you’re on the positive side, never push for an argument because no matter how valid yours is, they will always win. Remember that they want you to be angry and depressed. By the time they realize that their negative attitude annoys you, they will be relentless.

Show Empathy

One of the most hated actions by negative people is when others tell them what to do. If you come upon a conversation with one, do not assert yourself. What’s wiser is to show empathy especially when they begin to express emotion like anger, hatred, loneliness, pessimism, and other downbeat feelings. You might want to go with the flow and show them that you provide support. Just make sure you don’t show support by scolding. By the time you are able to enter their feelings, they will be able enough to face and solve their own issues.

Be There to Help

People who view their lives as unconstructive are usually emotionally disturbed. The reasons may vary but one thing is for sure – they need help. However, it’s quite hard to lend your hand since they may likely view it negatively. So you have to devise an approach plan of offering help. One that is kind enough for them to accommodate.

Avoid Provocation

Provocative action is the main trigger factor of negative people. When you show them even the slightest glimpse of provocation (though you may view it as more like a joke or humor), they will certainly react to it. So if you enter into a conversation with a negative person, avoid aggravation and stick to certain topics that will not light any fire.

Ignoring Can Be Helpful

We always view tolerance and ignoring some actions as a negative attitude. But when it comes to unenthusiastic people, the best formula for a conversation is to heed their negative comments and then forget them. In simple terms, don’t be affected by them. If you cannot control yourself, you can start a senseless argument.

Appreciation is Key

Bear in mind that negative people do not only view others negatively. They also see themselves as disappointing and unsatisfactory. As a result, they always bring that to themselves and the consequence would be the further alleviation of an emotional problem. If you a member of the family or a close friend is so negative about himself/herself, you must be able to look and find some things that are positive within them. Learn to appreciate the optimistic things they do. Recognize them and praise them for that. This way, you’re helping them build self-confidence, which is relatively absent as of the moment.

Be With a Crowd

When you and the negative person are stuck in conversation with a crowd, there’s a good chance that he/she deviates from talking negatively. However, you should also be reminded that anyone on the group can be targeted by rude and mean comments. Nonetheless, keeping him/her in the company of a crowd makes him feel sociable and likeable to other people.

Watch How You React

The way you react to negative and unhelpful comments may make or break an individual who has a very negative attitude. If you see a friend cursing herself, you don’t have to curse him more. If your mom scolds you for nothing, be calm and don’t react violently. Most of the time, bad arguments are spurred by negative people who find pleasure in seeing others react they way they want them to.

If All Else Fails, Find an Exit

Living or being near with someone who’s very negative is depressing and stressful. However, this doesn’t mean that you avoid them the minute you see some signs. What you need to do is try to help them, especially when they mean something to you or perhaps they are part of the family. Nonetheless, if all else fails and you think you’ve done enough to provide support, it’s practical to avoid them as much as you can.

Get guys attention-simple ways to get your man like you?

You can get the man you want and keep him by being unique. So get guys attentions don’t be like other women, since guys don’t want to hear gossip. Therefore don’t talk about other girls or guys you don’t like when you are with him.

Always keep the conversation positive and think about things that you like and ask him to do the same. Again one of the easiest ways to get the guys you want is to have fun when you are with him. Express your sense of humor in a way that reflects your personality.

Some women have witty and sarcastic sense of humors. Some giggle over the silliest things and some can tell hilarious stories and jokes. Now if you want to get then man you want, try to be as happy and positive as you can be when you are with him.

This way, he will surely know that you really enjoy being with him and he will feel happy being with you as well.  Stop feeling insecure since you have to feel comfortable about yourself. You need to get rid of all the insecurities that you are having.

It will show in the way you talk, walk, stand, sit and speak. Guys will get turn off if you don’t have confidence. It is high time that you need to be happy for who you are. So stop pretending to be someone you are not.

Show off what you have, since you are young, sexy and beautiful and have a wonderful personality. So you have to make sure that men see that. Don’t slouch and learn to sit up straight. Don’t always look down and you must hold your head up high and men will surely notice you.

I am sure you are aware of the fact that the way to a mans heart is through his stomach. You can win your office mates heart with food. If you don’t know how to cook then it is time for you to sign up in some cooking classes.

If you already know how to cook then try to whip something up and bring it to work. It can serve as your lunch or snack. If he sees and smells your food he would surely want to taste it. With the one first bite, you already have him. He will think that you are a keeper because you certainly know how to make his tummy happy.

Again guys don’t like it when their women don’t know how to play in the mud or sweat it out. So try to engage yourself in some sport and you can try something rough like rugby. It is one of the enjoyable sports and how will surely have the chance to meet a cute and hunky guy.

Be Leery Of The Problems In A Scorpio Relationship

If you have found yourself in a Scorpio relationship you better be prepared to be brave. Dont get me wrong, Scorpios are very loyal and can make wonderful companions, but in the heat of things when times might be tough you may end up being the one who gets fiercely stung.

Scorpios love to be the one controlling their environment and are the take charge kind
of person in any relationship. So you have to be tough and not give in on everything they want. You must understand a Scorpio’s nature and then you will know why they seem to want to take the lead with everything that is going on.

This does not mean you cant feel the need to ever take charge of anything. You will need to bravely express yourself when you want to do so. In this way you will actually win your Scorpio’s admiration, because aside from being natural leaders themselves, they also love it when someone else shows moxie and drive. Scorpios may want to take over everything but they lack determination and toughness many times. Show that and you can get on their good side.

Scorpios are attracted to a challenge, so it is wise for you to play hard to get sometimes. Just dont go overboard as they may eventually think you are not interested in them, and that would be a turnoff for them.

You dont want to heat things up too much in a relationship with a Scorpio, but you do want to keep it interesting enough to keep them excited. Assert yourself at times but not overly so. Scorpios are not necessarily aggressive so they like to win people over by diplomatic means more often. If you are too resistant to them too often, it will cause an argumentative relationship.

On a positive side Scorpios are usually generous partners and good loyal companions. They may even be slow to temper. But this sign of the sun person will get madly temperamental if pushed too long. It will not be a pretty sight when a Scorpio finally does get angry. They may seethe beneath their skin for a long time.

Some, but not many, Scorpios are of the forgiving type. This means if you mess up your relationship with them they most likely will hold a grudge for along time, if not forever. After a breakup if you were to talk to them again they usually will bring up all the wrong things you did that ended the relationship. You will feel like the entire breakup was your fault. Scorpios usually find it hard to forget and forgive.

One frustrating Scorpio tendency that you may encounter is this. They may be stomping around angry and you may have no clue what is wrong. When you ask what the problem is they may respond, “Can’t you figure it out?” This is just them assuming you know what has been on their mind.

If you have broken up with a Scorpio but manage to win him or her back you should keep in mind their personality. A Scorpio will assume you should be able to read their thoughts in every situation. Keep that in mind, and all the things in this article, when dealing with them if you want the relationship to work.

The only way to make things easier in this relationship situation is to let your Scorpio partner know that they need to communicate better when something is on their mind. Let them know you are not a mind reader. On your part you will have to be a very good listener and observer. You’ll need the ability to second-guess potential problems. If your Scorpio is not willing to work with you in your relationship it will be hard to get it to work out in the long run.

Essential Facts About Filipina Girls

Going out with a Filipina is one of the greatest decisions you have ever made. Filipino women are known over the world for their sweetness, kindness and intelligence, not to mention their stunning beauty. Their long black hair, smooth tanned skin and and charming disposition never fail to capture the heart of western men.

Now if you are one of those very lucky men who are already going out with a fabulous Filipina, it is only natural that you will do whatever it takes to make her happy. Fortunately, you do not have to be filthy rich or insanely handsome to satisfy your Filipina girlfriend. Of course, a solid financial background and good looks can help you, but these are really not prerequisites are far as Filipinas are concerned. What you need to do is find out what Filipinas are in order for you to know how to get along with her splendidly.

First thing that you should know about Filipinas is that they are generally conscious about how they handle themselves. They have a thing about conduct. This is true especially if your Filipina girlfriend comes from the provinces. In rural areas such as small barrios and towns, everyone knows everyone. One sign of misconduct will spread like wildfire across the town.

This is why most Filipinas formally introduce their boyfriends, western or not, to their parents. For Filipinos, being introduced and getting to know ones parents is a sign of seriousness of intent. The family plays a very important role in how a Filipina makes her decisions in life, and this includes her choice of men to go out or have a relationship with. More often than not, they will seek her familys approval before committing to a relationship with a man.

Second, almost all Filipinas will play hard to get during the courtship stage. Their high regard for conduct is largely responsible for this. They consider it inappropriate if women will give in easily to the attentions given by men. This is also an effective way for a Filipina to determine the sincerity of her suitor. So do not be surprised if the Filipina date will act coy during the initial stages.

Third, Filipinas love being pampered and taken care of. Although a typical Pinay can support herself without help from a man, it does not mean that she will not appreciate the little things that a man can do for her. After all, she is still a woman. If you are going out or having a relationship with a Filipina, you have to make the effort of communicating with her constantly through phone or email. There is no excuse for lack of communication nowadays; technologies such as text messaging and web messengers enable people to talk to each other everyday, even though they are thousands of miles apart. Your Filipina girlfriend is very aware of this and expects nothing less from her man.

Lastly, Filipinas are serious about relationship. Unlike western women, Filipino women are not so keen on playing around or having casual relationships. Most Filipinas would rather wait for the right man to come along rather than have flings just to have somebody around. This means that if you want to pursue having a relationship with a Filipina, you must be serious about it and forget about the idea of scoring a casual thing.

How to Date Hot Women and Keep Them!

Sadly, I’ve seen too numerous understudies of the amusement begin suspecting that in the event that they adapted a few systems, both essential and propelled, they would have a way of life loaded with hot ladies. Nothing could be further from reality. My own particular experience is a demonstration of this. When I turned out to be great at strategy based pickup I started to get truly hot ladies. In any case, keeping them was another matter out and out. I understood rapidly that I was all the while working from my old outlook of being apprehensive, possessive, and envious around them. This was not out of the ordinary as my inward diversion was not there. This is the point at which I started to lose these exceptionally same hot ladies.

It’s just plain obvious, the issue with the pickup group is that it is surface level, which means all system based. The kind of feeling that says fake it until you make it. All things considered, oh my goodness, having the capacity to effectively pull and oversee truly hot ladies and ladies of value is not a simple errand. There are no speedy fixes and these ladies can notice dread or a general absence of trust in a man. Give me a chance to clarify further what I mean by “certainty.” I don’t mean the certainty it takes to approach a ten. Any very much prepared PUA can do that. I mean the certainty to date one of these shockers and manage the numerous issues that accompanies them. They are as per the following:

* Most hot ladies experience existence with individuals giving them bunches of consideration. As her beau you are relied upon to pay her a gigantic measure of consideration. On the off chance that you don’t, you will lose her.

* Most hot ladies have exes that come around sometimes. You’ll have to manage that and not demonstrate an ounce of envy.

* Most hot ladies have satellites, which means fellow “companions” who come around sitting tight for the chance to do her. You’ll should be sufficiently secure not to go crazy at the numerous folks you find in her life.

* Most hot ladies are infants, which means they are exceptionally requesting and think the world owes them something. You’ll have to manage that.

* Most hot ladies are not scientific geniuses. They don’t need to be since they get by on their looks.

* Most hot ladies can be narrow minded and not consider your emotions at all.

* Most hot ladies hope to be gone out on the town. Be prepared to spend some money.

Presently strategy based diversion, which demonstrates to you industry standards to approach and draw, does not include every one of the subtleties of dating hot ladies or demonstrate to you generally accepted methods to handle the circumstances you may end up in with them. So how can one manage all the dramatization that can come? All things considered, let me first say that not each wonderful young lady you get with will accompany stuff. Some will be magnificent, humble young ladies who will make your life into a romance book. In any case, those are few and far between. The dominant part will test you forever. The most ideal approach to manage this is for you to get your inward amusement tight. This originates from turning internal and taking a gander at yourself and every one of your shortcomings. This is not a simple assignment and positively won’t be done overnight. Actually, it could take years. In any case, the sooner you begin, the sooner you can get on the way to getting a ten, as well as keeping her in your life.

Keeping in mind the end goal to get on that way we need to quit tricking ourselves with the conviction that strategies can take us to the finishes of the earth. Procedures are extremely restricting. Without the right conviction framework and practices you can overlook it. Another point that may be raised is the reason would anybody need a ten with all the negative issues said above? Actually a decent PUA on a propelled level, with both internal and external amusement adjusted, can bring about a movement in conduct from the ten. When she gets with a person who knows how to check her, her whole state of mind marvelously changes into that of a sweet, cherishing, humble young lady who will hold tight your each word. However, in the event that you don’t represent perfect togetherness then you can overlook it. You’ll have a beast staring you in the face.

Along these lines, I ask you to consider what I am stating and not fall for the thought that everything you need are some cool methods to be Mr. MacDaddy with hot ladies exploding your telephone. Not really. I comprehend that taking a shot at your inward diversion takes bunches of work. In any case, the prize is well justified, despite all the trouble and will enhance the nature of ladies throughout your life. On the off chance that you’ve ever seen an excellent lady wrapped around the arm of some ugly person, then you’ll comprehend what I am stating. He has aced the specialty of internal amusement and managing her show. Consider it!

AN EXPLORATION OF MAHESH DATTANI`S PLAY` WHERE THERE IS A WILL`

AN EXPLORATION OF MAHESH DATTANI`S PLAY` WHERE THERE IS A WILL BY DR. RAM SHARMA

Ever since his first play in 1988, Where there.s a will , Witch was rooted in the Gujrati familial dynamic , Dattani has in a sense chronicled the follies and prejudices of Indian society as reflected with in the microcorm of the family unit , The most tangible and dynamic reality in middle class Indian lives , Dattani calls the play an -exorcism of the patriarchal code- ( Dattani , 2000 : 4 49 ) and skillfully works his narrative around the intrigues and me of a dysfunctional Indian family ,, The play is set with in the conferies of four rooms two bedrooms , The living room and the derigueus dining room . In performance . Where there.s a will works with subtle contours that are handleld def——– , Not with standing the fact that this is Dattani;s first play . With family relationships as the focus of dramatic representation , Dattani;s handling of the performance space suggests to his audiences the vartations in signification allotted to ostensible simple . Through the connobuted design of the will , The relationships between the four main protagonist of a joint family are painfully twisted as the play begings to come alive in performance . this is a play where – Traditional ‘ family values clash with un experted twists in the tale that completely subvert exiting sterotypes . The story revolves around a supposedly – self made ‘ industrialist, Hasmukh Mehta, the patriarch who is the supreme malcontent with the typical problems of familial expectations, his lest less wife Sonal and a colourless conjugal life, his spend thrift son Ajit, and a u—— and conniving daughter in law Preeti, and last but hardly the lest, his mistress Kiran Jhaveri. All the four belie their names. Hasmukh is a dour – faced man who seems unable to smile, Sonal hardly shines, Ajit is not in the lest successful in his father’s eyes, and Preeti is as unaffectionate as Hashmukh is sour. And yet they are family , yoked together with in choice in the matter, and must function as a unit under the patriarchal order. Hasmukh – When I was twenty one, the greatest tragedy of my life took place, I got married – – The following year Ajit was born. Tragedy after tragedy – – – – ( 464 ) His son is a -nincompoo – He has not a single quality I look for in a son: He has made an my entire life worthless – – – It won’t be long before everything I worked for and achieved will be destroyed ! ” Immediately out side the family units stands Kiran, Hasmukh’s mistress, invisible until yhe patriarch dies and his will places her at the centre of the action. The highly dissatisfied Hasmukh is decidedly unhappy with the manner his life has been spent with no one living up to his expectations, the way he had lived up to his father’s. He must therefore get back at his family and teach them a protracted lesson. It is only by way of the will that he would attempt to tackle all these obstacles that he has been unable to correct with in his life time. Dattani works this out with the help of his extremely self – reflexive t—– – where Hasmukh speaks more to the audience directly then with any of the other protagonists, taking them into confidence. The play piquantly sketches his domineering patriarch who would revenge himself upon his – awaricious ‘ family by virtually cutting them out of his will, something they will discover only after his death. The colourless relationships between the two couples that comprise the family are developed in elaborate vignettes, portraying two singularly unexciting generations of couples sexually insipid and loveless, who remain in a typically materialistic and money – oriented upper middle – class mi– Ajit has b–.. to stand up to his father, taking it for granted that the inheritance is already his, and fiercely resists Hasmukh’s attempts at ( moulding ) him in his own model. While Sonal is proud of her son, her husband thinks he is a disaster, and Preeti, his wife is even worse. But he admits that she is clever, the only person who is a little wary of in the play, with a measure of justification. Kiran Jhaveri ,the epitome of the Dattani woman makes her appearance in the very first play that he wrote Smart ,Shrewd, calculating and worldly wise. Kiran embodies qualities that Dattani staunchly holds a positive and strong and necessary for a woman. Like most women who play gendered roles. Kiran is a victim too, but one who refuses to stay victimized. She becomes part of Hasmukh’s life with her eyes wide open, and aware of the benefits that she will derive from the relationship. A –. Is a part of her existence too, as she reveals to Ajit -I got a husband, my husband got his booze, and your father go – – – well, you know .- (491) Hasmukh Mehta excercises hegemonic power over the rest of his family to perpetuate his own conception of the self, which, he has in turn, received from his father. He meets with resistance at all point from the other members of his family -You still want to play Big Boss. And you can do it through me. In short, you want me to be you.-(460) says Ajit, and Hasmukh devices the means to continue this hegemony even from the grave. The will, here, becomes the iconic instrument to power and shapes and reshapes the destiny of the family relationships after his death. But the irony is that Hasmukh, to give the devil his due, transfers this controlling power to a woman and changes the entire fabric of the monolith that he is trying to preserve, immediately opening up the spaces the individual identity that he has all along sought to deny, death eases the pain of living says Hasmukh’s ghost -It feels good to be dead. No more kidney problems, no backaches, no heart beats – – — ( 479) Dattani explore some existantian augst here – What is this? A sandalwood garland? – – – when my father died, I used to put fresh flowers everyday for a whole month – – – ( takes a final look at his picture ) so that is how the world will remember me. Until my son looks me up in a trunk – – ( 487- 88 ) Where There Is a Will ( 1988 ) is a comedy with slight farcical touches which yet makes a point about the way patriarchal men invariably fail to exist as true human beings. The plot of this play revolves around the life of a man named Hasmukh Mehta. Who is a rich and successful businessman and his family. The action starts with Hasmukh having come home from office. Overhearing his twenty three year old son and Joint Managing Director of his form complaning about his father’s refusal to invest in new business ventures thought up by him. In a series of straight addresses or asides to the audience. Hasmukh. Classifies that he had thrown away his son Ajit’s project proposals unread because -If I Iet him have his way, we would all be panpers. Ajit, he plaintively adds – was bankrupt up here ( points to his head ) the day he was born. God just forgot to open an account for him.- Neither does Hasmukh have any love to spare for his wife Sonal or for his daughter – in – law Preeti whom he succinctly describes as – pretty, charming, graceful and sly as a snake- and sums her up as a girl who – has an eye on my money.- In course of scene, we learn that Hasmukh is a diabebtic and cardiac patient with a history of – high blood pressure, high cholesterol – (and ) an enlarged heart.- And all this goes towards explaining why towards the end of the first scene, he dies in bed where his wife discovers his dead body a few minutes later This is not the beginning of a tragedy however, for Hasmukh’s ghost lingers on in the house, wandering through its walls ( and occasionally setting cross – leggerd on the dining table ) keeping on passing acerbic comments on the actions band attitudes of the other (living ) characters, though unheard by, and invisible to, them comically, even a member of the audience is not spared Hasmukh’s ghost’s not – so —-. Criticism, for at one point soon after he has passed away and assumed the role of a mock- chorus his ghost sprawls on the dining table and dangles head and arums over its edge in imitation of swinging upside down from a tamarind tree, and points to a spectator in the auditorium and tells him sternly – your shoes need polishing.- The central issue of the comedy its complication – however emerges in its second scene in which it is revealed that none of his expectant family members have inherited his money, for what Hasmukh Mehta has done is to fform a Trust to be administered over by his former mistress Kiran Jhaveri as the Trustee. Infact, according to the terms of Mehta’s will, not only will his son not inherit his father’s money and property until he is forty -five but he will also have to compulsorily attend office everyday from 9 to 6 and remain under the official tutelage of Mrs. Jhaveri. And finally and most insulting to all the members of the family Mehta’s will stipulates that his former mistress will move in and live in his family till the Trust be dissolved twenty two years hence. All this point to the thesis of the play, which is the patriarchal dominance of Hasmukh Mehta both in the course of his life and after. As Ajit confesses after his father’s death -Even since I was a little boy, you have been running my life. Do this do that or don’t do that, do this. Was I scared of you!- Or as Preeti, the daughter in law, tells Ajit -he was a slave driver, your father! He almost drove me mad with his bossy nature. He succeeded with your mother- Even Kiran, the man’s mistress, confesses to his wife at a candid moment u -He was so insensitive to other people’s needs – yes. Mrs. Mehta. My father, your husband – they were g weak men with false strength – will the scars our parents lay on us remain forever- w h The truth that emerges finally is that Hasmukh Mehta had wanted his son to live in his own image, just as he had lived his own life in thrall to his father’s shadow : Kiran I should have hated him. Like I should have hated my father, my brothers and my husband. But all I felt for him was pity. Hasmukh (As a ghost ) Enough: I say, enough: I paid you to do my work. Not ridicule me! Kiran: Even his attempts at ruling over you after his death, through his will, are pathetic ( Hasmukh sticks his fingers into his ears and shuts his eyes ) The only reason he wanted to do that is because his father had ruled over his family. All his life he was being a good boy to his father. Sonal: How little I know him. If I had understood his when he was alive, I would have died laughing. (510) It emerges too that Mrs. Sonal Mehta had lived her life under the total dominance of her sister Minal, who always -decided what we should wear, what games we should play- and -Even at my husband’s f–. – – sat beside me and told me when to cry.- But to the play is not yet over, for in a surprise twist at the end it is revealed that Preeti had actually hastened, if not caused, the death of her father-in-law. Kiran holds this truth against Preeti, not to blackmail her, but to achieve a proper comic resolution by which the wife bonds wife the husband, and the family bonds with Kiran and the Ghost of Hasmukh leaves the house forever. Kiran : No, they are not. These are your father- in- law’s tablets. They controlled his blood pressure. They kept him alive. (Shows her the tablets in her other hand ). These are your vitamins. Now I’ll mix them up. ( Mixes them and throws them on the bed ) can you tell the difference? No, you can’t. unless you look very close. The companies names are embossed on the tablets. But a person who is used to taking them every day will not look so close (Studies Preeti, who is trembling now) The tablets you throw out of the window where the ones for high blood pressure. The tablets I found on his dressing table were your – – – Vitamins (Preeti starts sobbing) When did you exchange them? Oh, you could have done it any time. You had plenty of opportunity. He was right – you are very clever.Of course you didn’t kill him. You just let nature do the work for you. Were you so impatient? Couldn’t you want a few more years? Oh, I’m glad he made his will ! you don’t deserve any of his money. Each of the family members having discovered his or her own identity finally separate from Hasmukh over whelming self. All of them cheer to that. Hasmukh enters. But he stops at the doorway. The others continue a light animated coversation. Hasmukh . No, I don’t think I can enter this house. It isn’t mine – – more. I will rest permanently on the tamarind tree. ( Laughter at the table ) They are not my family any more. I wish I had never interfered with their lives. They look quite happy together. With Kiran Sitting in my place. Oh, I wish I had been more – I wish I had lived ( Exists ) Sonal : Oh, by the way, Aju, I wanted to tell you our neighbours complained today. Our tamarind tree is over—— and abstracts their electric wires. Why don’t you have it trimmed ? Where There is a Will is quite evidently a young man’s play which shows fairly optimistically that there is a way by which men and women can find happiness on their own terms. The developments, twists and surprises in the action are not however not facilely based on contrivances of plotting alone but for more appropreately on human motivations and wills. Each of the characters also develops Ajit ( or Aju as his mother fondly calls him ) is first projected through his father’s unsympathetic eyes as a mother’s darling and an ineffectual, nincompoop – an estimation which even his wife seems to share – but is then shown to have resisted and even won, in however infinitesimal a way, against his father in the battle of wills. Mrs. Mehta who had lived and suffered so long under the dominance of her husband and her sister, is shown to come into her own at the end of the play. Kiran : Wrong. I learnt my lesson from being so close to life. I learnt my lesson from watching my mother tolerating my father when he came home everyday with bottles of sum wrapped up in news paper. As I watched him beating her up and calling her name. I learnt what life was when my mother pretended she was happy in front of me and my brother, so that we wouldn’t hate my father. And I learnt when I kept my mother away from my father, so that in return he would remain silent for those three hours when he came home, and before he fell asleep on the dining table, to drunk to harm us anymore. I served him those drinks, waiting for that moment when he would become unconscious and I would say a prayer – – Thank God he was too drunk to impose himself on us ! yes, Mrs. Mehta. My father, your husband – they were weak men with false strength. While Kiran Jhaveri finds the happiness that had so long eluded her in her past existence as a business executive cum – mistress to a rich man and as daughter to a drunkard and wife to another. The liberation of these characters from the strange hold of their past is of course also the defeat of Hasmukh Mehta. This domineering husband, heavy father and tyrannical boss is gradually dwarfed and diminished to the point of insignificance. Of course he never quite loses our sympathy for he is given an engaging, comic vitality and verse ( both in the flesh as well as a spectra) but we can not help being unused when we hear that his erstwhile family has made plans to cut down the tamarind tree in the garden – his last terrestia haunt. The truth underlying the comedy is serious enough, the man who would rule over his family ever after his death is exposed at the end to be what he really was – comitragic weak ling who had constantly quested for a father- substitute, a man who was rude to everyone because he was e insecure himself, an unfaithful husband who didn’t really want a mistress – – – [but] a woman who would father him.- The so-called -Thesis Play- in which a well – made plot provides opportunities to the characters to interact and to illustrate through their relationship the dramatist’s idea is of course as old as Ibsen. That Dattani draws upon and exploits the resources of this convention of theatrical is manifest in the way Preeti’s substitution of her vitamin pills in the bottle of her father- in – law’s blood pressure tablets is discovered through a series of logical steps. Preeti’s frustration at not having inherited Hasmukh’s money leads her to abuse her husband and subsequently to burnt into tears. Ajit’s concern about the well being of his pregnant wife leads him to book for tranquillizers and he comes upon his father’s tablets in Preeti’s vitamin – pill bottle. Preeti cleverly seems her husband away from the room before he can inspect the tablets and throws them away together with the bottle out of the window, only to see Kiran pick them up below. Ajit still looking for the tranquillizers finds the tablets his father used to take for his blood pressure ( in reality Preeti’s ineffectual vitamin pills ) and leaves them on the dressing table in Hasmukh -s ( now Karan’s ) bedroom. Later, Kiran comes across this bottle compares its contents with the tablets in the bottle she had picked up, and deduces Preeti’s dead of substitution. – Kiran ( shows her the tablets ) What are these ? ( No response ) you should know. You threw them out of window. Don’t deny it ! I saw you. Preeti – Oh those. These are my vitamins. Kiran – Are they ? Preeti – Yes Kiran – Are you sure ? Preeti – Yes Kiran – Why did you throw them out of the window ? Preeti – I didn’t need them any more. Kiran – So these are your vitamins, are they Prity (weakly ) – yes.- Yet, what adds a new freshness to the old way of the thesis play is the sparkle of the dialogues and the text we of its presentation. To cite an example, here is the dead Hasmukh contemplating his photograph, put up by his son in a – conspricuous place.- What’s this ? A sandalwood garland ? Don’t I get fresh flowers everyday ? when my father died, I used to put fresh flowers on his photograph everyday for a whole month before getting a sandalwood garland. I wonder what became of his photograph ? It was much bigger than this one. I also had it touched up to make look more – – – dignified. Of course, I don’t need help in that department. These cheeks are toohollow. The lips are too tight. ( stares for a while, them to the audience, seriously ) I don’t have such mean little eyes, do I ? My father had. Thirty wears of living in the city and he got mean little eyes. Now where did that photograph of his go ?I had taken it down when the walls were repainted. It’s locked up in some trunk some where. I suppose ( Takes a final look at his picture ) so that’s it. This is how the world will remember me. Until my son locks me up in a trunk. ( Turns to Ajit ) Then all that remains of me is ( points to Ajit ) That’ ( pause ) This calls for some fresh air. I think I’ll go out side and swing on the tamarind tree. Upside down, t—— clear my head. (Exits through the main door ) ( 487 – 88 ) The first thing that strikes about this speech is that it possesses a typically Indian flavour in its references to fresh flowers, sandalwood, garland, trunk and tamarind tree. The rather typical carping of the urbanized and more materially successful son ( even though dead ) about a rustic dehati father comer out in the lines- I – – – ha it touched up to make him look more – – – dignified- and – thirty years of living in the city and he got mean little.- Some other dialogues in the play have an almost w——- hue of wit, as in Kiran’s – useful. What a useful thing to be. ) But what is far more innovative and original on the part of Dattani as a dramatist is his use of the injected dialogues of Hasmukh which, through unheard by the other characters, introduce a further dimension of implication for the benefit of the audience. Kiran – He was just like his father, wasn’t he ? Hasmukh – No, I wasn’t Sonal – Yes. He was Hasmukh – Don’t contradict me, woman ! Kiran – The same bossy nature ? Sonal – ( together ) No ! Hasmukh Yes ! Kiran – Did he ever disgrace with his father ! Sonal ( together ) No ! Hasmukh Yes ! Kiran – Did he ever do anything at all without consulting his father first ? Sonal ( together ) No, never ! Hasmukh Yes always ! (509 ) Superficially comic and evocative of laughter, this finitely embodies a kind of dialogic strategy in that we are privileged to hear two contradictory statements about the same person. Un like the Bakhtinian model of the dialogic in which there exists – a plurality of independent and unmerged voices and consciousnesses, a genuine polyphony of fully valid voices-. We are of course expected to em——– with Sonal here is, in other words, ironic. But the device of an apparition’s dialogues accomplishing the irony is also an extension and a radical one, of the older tradition of having a character say something in an aside and then of showing him to do or say something in an aside and then of showing him to do or say something contrary in the presence of other characters. In any case, Dattani’s use of visible / invisible, audible / inaudible ghost significantly pushes back the accepted borders of naturalistic drama. In Where There’s a Will, we meet characters drown from two generations, the father and the mother in Hasmukh and Sonal Mehta, and Ajit their son and his wife Preeti. Hasmukh is not happy about the prodigal behaviour of his son and also with the vain glorious attitude of his wife, Sonal. What he expects is implicit obedience to him, as he practiced it in his father’s case. When things drift away from his control he thinks of a checkmate. He creates a trust and appoints his mistress Kiran Jhaveri its trustee. This move renders all the members of the family to the position of pensioners. Even after his death. Hasmukh haunts his houseas a ghost.The evil of patriarchy take centre stage in this play. Dattami covertly asserts that where there is a will there is a way. Dattani’s dramatic art has been appreciated for its fine fabric of philosophic undertone and social consciousness. The philosophic reflections on the predicament of human destiny against the odds of socio- cultural practices, impart an exceptional depth and richness to his plays. However, Where There is a Will is a positive justification to the observation that Dattani’s genius is equally fertile both in comic plays and serious plays. The comic mode has even have a far reaching effect than tragedy. It is predicted – Satire, irony, gallous, humour and other mutations of the comic spirit will be the guiding force of over theatre in the coming years and tragedy has little to offer to a rebellious generation obsessed by the danger of the mega- deaths.” The play Where there is a will is a comic caricature with the family as a local. The focus of the dramatic is on the issues like gender discrimination and the domination of patriarchal authority. The dramatic structure. The setting of the play, verbal repartee and incongruity in human behaviour makes play a fine entertainment. Sita Raina, a well know Delhi based actress and theatre director writes in the note of the play. – Where There’s a Will as several interesting aspects. Mahesh described it as the exorcism of the patriarchial code. Women- be it daughter- in- law, wife or mistress. are dependent on men and this play shows what happens when they are pushed to the edge. What interested me particularly was its philosophical twist. To be the watcher of one’s a will, has control over his family through his money and forgoes on opportunity improve his interpersonal relationships. As do most of us. Consequently, when he became the watcher of his actions, he perceives that his desire for control head led him to be the victim of his own machinations unlike Kiran who uses powers play to essentially improve her relationship. The play is originally set in Gujarati family, but since I was not familiar with that millierr, Mahesh agreed to localizing it.- Besides, the ease and brilliance of dialogue, the straight expontion of action, provide better opportunity for the direct communication between the audience and the actors. Mahesh Dattani describes it as the exorcism of patriarchal code. Sita Raina, the well known theatre direction appreciated it for its -philosophical twist’ because Dattani efficiently manipulates the incidents for self enlightenment to expose the illusion of false authority. He promotes the idea that the passion for power and domination signifies the insecurity of an individual. One can nourish the dream of dominating others for a short while but the fact is well known that each individual fames his own dreams of life and their essential spirit can never be checked. – What interested me particularly was its philosophical twist. To be the watchers of one’s self is to make intelligent charges in this life. In Where There is a Will Hasmukh has control over his family through his money and forges the opportunity to improve his interpersonal relationship. As do most of us. When he became the watcher of his actions, he perceives that his desire for control had led him to be the victim of his own Machination – -.- The humour in the play through the visible and invisible presence of Hasmukh, especially after his appearance as a Ghost, his mute observations and the free display of the inner feelings of different characters against the authority of Hasmukh, is a unique device for self-assessment for the characters. The central action in the play Where There is a Will take place in the lavish house of Hasmukh Mehta. There are three spaces : dinning room cum living room, bed room of Husmukh Mehta and Sonal Mehta, and the decorated room of Ajat, their son and Preeti, his wife.

Act I (1) The lavish house of Hasmukh Mehta. There are three spaces, the fancy dining cum living room, the bedroom belonging to Hasmukh and Sonal Mehta and the hideously trendy bedroom, of their son, Ajit and his wife Preeti. Ajit is in the living room, talking on the Phone. Preeti is drifting in and out of the kitchen, loading the table with food for dinner. She is pregnant, Hasmukh enters through the main door with his walking stick. Each character in the play provides an appropriate foil to his/her counter part. If Hasmukh is dictatorial type husband, his wife Sonal is a submissive housewife dedicated to the choices of her husband. Business world is dominated by Hasmukh, Sonal occupies the space in kitchen and Pooja room. -Hasmukh There’s enough here to feed an elephant’s family! Sonal it’s all right for you say that, you are on a died. But what about our growing son. He needs proper nourishment. Hasmukh (scoffing) Growing son ! I tell you we are all getting enough nourishment. There’s no need to make parathas. Sonal. May be you are getting enough. I’m making them for Aju (Moves towards kitchen again) Hasmukh wait : (Sonal stops) I say there’s no need to make parathas Sonal – Aju wants them Hasmukh – He does not Sonal – How do you Know? Hasmukh – I know my son better than you know him. Sonal – Oh. So now I don’t know my own son. What makes you so sure you know him? Hasmukh – I don’t. But I know he doesn’t want parethas right now.- The similar contrast is seen in Preeti and Ajit. He is weak and insignificant in presence of his father but Preeti is calculative to observe all activities of the household. -Hasmukh (Applauds). Well done! Preeti (Coming to the landing) what’s the matter? Sonal – He’s gone! Preeti – Oh no, don’t say that. He may come home late, but he won’t run away or anything like that Sonal – Who – – What? Preeti – Look, there’s no needs to get worried. If you want, I’ll call Deepak and find out whether Aju is there with Him Sonal – (Hysterically) No! I don’t mean him! His father. He gone! Preeti – Gone where? Sonal (Screaming) Don’t you understand? He’s – – gone ! Preeti slowly understands. Screech of tyros and the sound of a car coming to a halt. In the mean time, Preeti confirms that Halmukh is dead, she comes down to the landing stops and screams. Ajit comes rushing in. Ajit – what’s the matter? Preeti, Your father. He’s – – gone Ajit – (moves towards them) what! The two women start sobbing. Lights fade out on them. Spotlight pricks up Hasmukh or rather his ghost he stands arms akimbo. And for the first time in the play, he grins form ear to ear.- Hasmukh Mehta exercises hegemonic power over the rest of his family members to perpetuate his own conception of -self’ which he has in turn received from his father. He does not allow Ajit to speak to government officials or to discuss business matters with his friends. His aboo—.. authority over his business, house and other articles is amazing and ridiculous. -Ajit (on the phone) Five lakhs that’s all. Give me Five lakhs and I’ll modernize the whole bloody plant. That’s what I tell my dad. I mean, come on, five lakh is nothing! Hasmukh (to the audience) My sone the business man? Just listen to him. Ajit – I mean, it’s not as if I want the money for myself. It’s for his factory. But he just won’t listen to me. I don’t think he has listened to me entirelife. Hasmukh – Do you blame me for not listening to him? If I paid any attention to even one of his crackpot schemes. I wouldn’t be around to listen to anybody. Ajit – After all, I am the joint managing director. Hasmukh – Believe me, appointing him as the JMD was a big mistake. Ajit – And, after all, I am his son. Hasmukh – That was an even bigger mistake, what makes it worse is knowing that I actually prayed to get him. Oh God : I regret it all. Please let him just drop dead. No, no. What a terrible thing to say about one’s own son. I take it back. Dear God, don’t let him drop dead. Just turn him into a nice vegetable so he won’t be in my way. Ever since he entered my factory, he has been in my way. (CP p.455)

Hasmukh Mehta exercises hegemonic power over the rest of his family members to perpetuate his own conception of -self’ which he has in turn received from his father. He does allow Ajit to speak to government officials or to discuss business matters with his friends. His absolute authority over his business, house and other articles in amazing and ridiculous. -Hasmukh -That is too much ! (Goes to his room and pricks up the extension) Listen, you idiot. How many times have I told you not to speak to government officials : Fool! Ajit – Daddy! Hasmukh – And how many times have I told you not to talk to your friends about business matters! Swine! You won’t rest until you, he seen us all on the streets! Ajit – Daddy. Don’t shout, please what will Deepak think? Hasmuk – And you listen too, Dilip Ajit – Deepak, Daddy, please! Hasmukh – Deepak or Champak, whatever your name may be. If you are the same boy who comes to my office and flirts with my typists, then take some advice from an elder. Go home and mind your own business, or your father’s business. Yes. Go to your father’s typists. Then when he is fade up with you and throws you out. Come and join my son – on the roads. The two boy you can go singing on the highways like they do in films (Slams the phone down, painting) Ajit – (on the phone) Listen, Deepak I’ll call you again. What? Sure, take all the typists to the disco of you want. I don’t care. (buts the receiver down) Hasmukh – you think my son is the cause of my hypertension? Wait till you meet my wife (Enters the living room) Ajit – Daddy, you have no right to humiliate me in front of my friends! Hasmukh – I am not trying to humiliate you. I am trying to put some sense in you. Trying to fill up empty scaces.- (CP- 458) In the presence of Hasmukh, Ajit survives as a subaltern who can’t even speak. He has a realization of his position but his no power to express his choice. He expresses his anguish -Anything I do is wrong for you! Just because you are a self – made man and had a deprived child hood.- (C P – 454) The over interference of Hasmukh in the life of Ajit manifests the horrors of patriarchy that aims to control freedom and selfhood of all these who come under its umbrella.

Hasmukh – You have the right to listen to my advice and obey my orders. Ajit – Thank you, You are so generous. I could kiss your feet. Hasmukh – There’s no need to do that. Just polish my shoes every morning and I’ll be happy. Ajit – You will never happy. Not until all of us dance to your time. And I will never do that. Hasmukh – Don’t be so stubborn! Ajit – You are stubborn too! Hasmukh – I’m stubborn because I know I’m right. You’re stubborn because you are a nincompoop! (CP P. 458) Ajit in ispite of being a simpleton, is aware enough to ridicule the passion of his father – I mean that you want to run the show, play Big Boss as long as you can or as long as God permits. And when all of a sudden, you are -called to be a better world’ you will still want to play Big Boss- Hasmukh is confident that Ajit would not able to make spaces for himself without his protection and guidance. He calls Ajit a -zero’ -Hasmukh – Nowhere! That is just my point! If you are you, than you are no where. You are nothing just a big zero. No matter what you do, you you’ll remain a zero. Zero, Zero, Zero. On their own, the zeroes don’t mean a thing. But if there’s a number one standing before all those zeroes, then they really add up to a lot. Ajit – And I suppose you think you’re the number one In front of my zeroes. Hasmukh – Yes! Now you understand ! You do understand? At last! Ajit – How can anyone in this world be such a pompous fool? HASMUKH – A fool – yes Pompous? No , I don’t think you are pompous. You need brains to be pompous. (CP 461) In Hasmukh’s life, there are to distinctive spaces representing his interpersonal relationship – his relationship with his wife and son, and his relationship with his business world. -Sonal – How many times have I told you not to smoke? (Snatches the cigarette from Hasmukh) who do you think the doctors will blame if you get another heart attack? Me, who else? (stubs out the cigarette in an ashtray) And my sister Minal? Do you know what she told me when you got your first attack? You are not firm with him, she said. You know he has an abnormal heart but you still let him carry on smoking and drinking. My own sister blaming me for your condition! As if you would listen to me even if I was firm with. Hasmukh – Ha ! Doctors ! All they have to do is blame it all on my smoking and drinking. As for your sister Minal, she has as much brains as made monkey. (CP 467) One is chaotic and in complete while other is perfect and complete. However, In both these conditions he maintains his absolute control. He accuses his wife for wasting money in preparing rich dishes. -Hasmukh – What’s in it? Sonal – Carrot, cucumber and beetroot HASMUKH – Only sick people eat carrot, cucumber and beetroot. I want some real food what’s this? PREETI – That’s Aju’s halwa ! HASMUKH – Aha : (whisks it away form the table and rises. SONAL – You can’t eat that! What about your diabetes? The doctor said HASMUKH – (quite sternly) Enough ! One more word from you and I’ll personally put you on the next plane to Ahmedabad . (CP 472) He acknowledges Sonal’s company as the greatest tragedy of his life -then when I was twenty – one the greatest tragedy of my life took place.- Irony is obvious, Sonal is tragedy of his life but she is every time careful of his tables, high blood pressure and heart attacks. Hasmukh’s passion for authority and Sonal’s extreme submissiveness produces sentimental humour. – SONAL – (To Hasmukh) Have you finished eating the halwa? HASMUKH – Yes SONAL – Good. Are you satisfied ? If you want to eat something else apart from my head, there’s there is plenty here. HASMUKH – No, I don’t want to eat anything else. You can throw your head and the food into the rubbish box. (Gets up and makes to go to his bedroom) SONAL – Why don’t you go for a walk? May be you can digest some of that sugar. HASMUKH – I don’t feel like walking. I’ve already been out walking.- (CP 474) Hasmukh condemns his wife for her unability to realize the intricacy of business and even her failure to provide him a good healthy married life. His accusation is -twenty five years of marriage and I don’t think she has ever enjoyed sex. Twenty five years of marriage and I haven’t enjoyed sex with her. Hasmukh takes it as his right to display his dreams in which there is no space for the desires of others. Hasmukh’s statement about his wife strikes a tone of sarcasm and sexual colonialism. For him a faithful is as good as a faithful dog- Then I should be a vary happy man. I’ve get a loving wife who has been faithful to me like any dog would be.- (CP 473) Has Hasmukh’s consciousness of his authority, contempt for the simplicity of his son mockery of the submissiveness of his wife prepares a very ridiculous image of patriarchal authority. For him Ajit is his investment and he seeks the return of his own investment. -HASMUKH – Why does a man marry ? So that he can have a woman all to himself ? There’s more to it then that what ? Many be he need a faithful companion ? No. If that was it all men would keep dogs. No, No, I thing the important reason anyone should marry at all is to get a son. Why is it so important to get a son ? Because the son will carry on the family name ? ( pause ) Why did I marry ? Yes, to get a son. So that when I grow old, I can live life again through my son. Why did my father marry ? To get me. What6 did I marry ? To get Ajit – – ( An expression of di—— appears briefly on his face, then he coughs ) Then I should be a very happy man. I’ve got a loving wife who has been faithful to me like any dog would be. She has given me a son, which is what I wanted from her in the first place. I should be happy, right ? I’ve got what I want. ( Pause, Draws on his cigarette ) why do I have a mistress ? Because I am unhappy. ( Pause ) Why am I unhappy ? Because I don’t have a son, who is Ajit ? Isn’t he my son ? No. He’s just a boy who spends my money and lives in my house. He doesn’t behave like my son. A son should make me happy. Like I made my father happy. I listened to him. I did what he told me to do. I worked for him. I worked hard for him. I made him happy. That is what I wanted my son to make me. ( Gets a little worked up, But he failed ! Miserably ! He has not a single quality I look for him in a son ! He has made my entire life worthless ! He is going to destroy me ! it won’t be long before everything I worked for and achieved will be destroyed ! Finished because of him ! Well, I won’t let it happen ! I won’t let it happen ! I won’t let it. ( CP 475 ) He has his own vision of happiness but no happiness can come out in the form of domination that he has been exercising over Ajit and Sonal. In the first part of the play, Dattani presents a comprehensive but ridiculous concept of patriarchy it is not confined to gender binary alone, but it includes all modes of power domination. It is not a matter of convention but a matter of thought and attitude. Milton. During 17th century published his Doctrine and Discipline of Divorce and here he presents the relationship between – ruler ‘ and – subject ‘ medititated through the institution of marriage. He wrote – A family is a little commonwealth – – a school where in the first principles and grounds of government and subjection and learned – – so we may say of inferiors that can not be subject in family, they will hardly bought to yield, such subjection is very ought in church or commonwealth.-

Dattani is a tireless innovators who makes experiments with new theatrical devices to sustain nobility and dynamism. In the second part of the play, Hasmukh is dead but he appears on the stage as a Ghost. In his invisible presence, he encounters the inner conscience of all these characters whom he dominates in his life time. The idea of invisible presence as a super observer to make an assessment of his doings, is an excellent device of self realization. HASMUKH (to the audience ) Have you ever swing on a tamarind tree ? up side down ? you should try it some time. You can see the world the way it really is . it’s important to get a good grip on the branch with your legs. Then you can relax your hands and head. Like this. ( Demonstrate by lying on his back and letting his head and hands dangle over the side of the table ) How do I look ? I don’t know about me, but you all de3finitely look peculiar ( Points at someone ) your shoes need polishing. ( Straightens up ) That’s why the way I see my family now. Their lives have been turned upside down since Kiran entered this house. I suppose it was a nasty thing to do. Making Kiran come and live here. You may ask – what kind of a fool would ask him mistress to live with his family ? a fool who knows his family very well. Kiran may have been my mistress but she has far more brains than my wife ever had. But you should she her now, my wife ! Transformed. From stupid incapable house wife to clever incapable house wife. Everyday is a new lesson for her on husband – understanding. The more time she spends with Kiran, the more she learns about me. The more she learns about me, the more she will regret having been such a good – for – nothing wife. That will keep her being a happy widow ever after. One thing I can’t stand is a happy widow. There should be a low against them. ( Pause. He resumes his cr——- — position. ) There’s one more reason why I want Kiran here. To keep a check on my daughter – in – law. If there’s any more who has me worried, it’s her, she is a clever piece. Might find some loophole in the will. But Kiran is too clever for her. Any woman who is a mistress and a wife has to be clever. ( CP 496 ) It also contributes to sustain a lively humour with a constant shifts between illusion and reality. The garb of authority maintained by Hasmukh was method to save his own inner self from clashes of out side world. After the death of Hasmukh, the real nature of each character is freely revealed and their comments present a fine mockery of parental authority. Hasmukh intends to govern the fate of his family members even after his death. He assigned his – will ‘ to Kiran , an executive in her business. He is dead but Sonal is still to innocent to realize the distinction of life and death and she is still anxious for his tablets. After Hasmukh’s death, in spite of customary morning, there is a deep sigh of relief for every member of the family. – AJIT – I did not step in to my father’s shoes without a peep. PREETI – oh, so you did peep ! sorry. I didn’t hear you. May be you didn’t peep loud enough ! AJIT – I did not step in to my father’s shoes. I was shoved in to them. PREETI – By whom ? AJIT – BY my father ! HASMUKH – I didn’t shove him anywhere ( To the audience ) Did you ever see me showing around ? PREETI – What – – what are you saying ? AJIT – Can’t you see ? He is still alive. Though his will : Through his mistress PREETI – Oh ! the two things I hate most in this house. The will and his mistress ! Followed closely by your mother. AJIT – He is making me do things he wanted me to do. Through her : In the office. Without realizing it she has replaced father and is replacing me with father. PREETI – What are you talking about ? HASMUKH – He has never made any sense to me. You try your luck. ( CP. 500 / 501 ) Preeti, an obedient daughter – in – law emerges as a cunning and calculative woman having a perfect idea of her father – in – law’s intentions. The amazing reactions and witty remarks of Hasmukh at the reality of Sonal, Ajit and Preeti remarks Hasmukh at the reality of Sonal. Ajit and Preeti makes the play a sparking comedy. Sonan expresses her concept on the realization he used to have a mistress. She gathers courage to challenge his authority. – SONAL – And he wasn’t exactly in love with me either. If I’d known me had a mistress, I would have left him. HASMUKH – I should have told her years ago then. PREETi – Well. I have to suffer on account of you two. SONAL – How can you say that ? PREETI – He didn’t get along well with both you. So he did what he did. I was always obedient to him. SONAL – I haven’t noticed him leaving you any money ! you didn’t fool him for a second. HASMUKH – full makes! PREETI- Rubbish! SONAL- Anybody, it hardly your place to talk about money. You’ve married above your standars. PREETI – Well, that hardly holds good now, does it ? SONAL – How dare you say that ? PREETI – At last my father didn’t keep a mistress! AJIT – Preeti ! Don’t talk to mummy like that. SONAL _ That’s because he couldn,t offord one! HASMUKH _ Not bad at all ! I’ve misjudged the woman. (C P 481)

Preeti does not like the decision of appointing Kiran, the trustee of property. He clever advise gives an insight in to her character. She advises that they must try to prove that Hasmukh made his will not in the right frame of mind and it would make the will – invalid ‘. with exceptional ease she advises – Everything will be all right. All we have to do is get a doctor to say that he wasn’t all there during the last few months.- ( CP 482 ) Hasmukh Mehta in his invisible presence intends to control the fortune of his family members by controlling economic resources but the futility of his illusion has been exposed in the response of Preeti, Ajit and Sonal. Each one of them feels the suffocation of the authority of Hasmukh. Preeti’s whole concern is money. Sonal is conscious for her own freedom. Ajit laments his helplessness against the authority of his father that reduced his identity to cipher. If Preeti is contented. Ajit is anguished.

-HASMUKH – If he could feel me. I would kick him in the pants. AJIT – Everything is going according to your plans. You really have us concerned. You know I’m not fond of your money to give it all up and say to hell with you and your will. HASMUKH – I was very sure about that. Why do you thing I made the will ? AJIT – You must be happy now, wherever you are ( Steps Back ) Ever since I was a little boy, you have been running my life. Do this do that or don’t do that, do this. Was I scared of you ! Then, when I grew up, I learnt to assure you back. And were you furious with me ! I thing it was worth disagreeing with you. At last I have the satisfaction of knowing that you were worried about me. HASMUKH – Worried ? yes, like I was worried about my defective kidneys ( CP 487 ) Ajit regrets to get only a nominal salary out of the property of c——–. However, at this j——-, the authority of Hasmukh is reduced to the position of a photograph with sandalwood. In the later part of the play ( Will assumes the dimension of a living character. It controls and guides the action and dreams of each member of the family. Sonal admits – The will has left us all naked.- Kiran, in spite of controlling the authority, is only a trustee of all his wealth and not the owner it is not only the – Will ‘ the document, but the – Will ‘ choice of Hasmukh. Kiran too is subordinate to the will of Mehta. She is only an agent having no choice of her own. Her authority is confined only to the welfare of the business of Mr. Mehta. She comments – My main duty is to run the Mehta Group of Industries on behalf of Ajit Mehta. I have the authority to make all the major decisions in the interest of companies.- ( CP 493 ) The first part of Where There is a Will the assertion of patriarchy, second part is the mockery of patriarchy and second part of second act is the collapse of patriarchy. Earlier, Hasmukh had his own calculation. Have you ever swing on the tamarind tree ? upside down ? you should try it sometime. You can see the world the way it really is. It is important to get a good group on the branch with your legs. Than you can relax your hands and heads. Ajit is disgusted with the pain of rigorous office work. Contrary to his disgust, Sonal plans to make a – denture of solid gold ‘ and a – diamond necklace ‘ because she fancied her self to look widow who looks like – Diwali Crackers. ‘ Authority shifts to Sonal and as a careful mother – in – law, she tries to control the life of Preeti. Parental authority comes to Kiran in administrative affairs and it comes to Sonal in domestic affairs. Ajit still finds himself a – cipher ‘ for him Kiran’s authority brings a greater mental torture. He expresses his suffocation. – Everything she tells me to do is exactly what he would have wanted me to do. We are all living out a dead man’s dream! Quite a price to pay for a few crores of rupees to tide us by our old age.- Dattani manipulates the events in the play to tear the veil of illusion of parental authority. -Will’ is designed to control the fate of these who depend on him. It is said -The will here becomes the iconic instrument to power to shape and reshape the destiny of the family / familial relationship after his death. But the irony is that Hasmukh to give the devil his due, transfer this controlling the entire fabric of the monolithic that he is trying to preserve, immediately opening up the spaces for the individual identity that has all along sought to deny and witty and sparking dialogues are calculatively designed to give an insight into human frailities. The following dialogue is appropriate to give an insight into the intentions of Kiran and Sonal Kiran – No, I did all the cooking myself. Sonal – Really ! How did you manage ? cooking and work and everything. Kiran – I managed, I managed my work, I managed house, I managed my husband. Sonal – And mine too Kiran – Yes : your husband and your house too. Sonal’s single statement and mine too immediately thwarts all pride and arrogance of Kiran

Hasmukh Mehta’s parental authority was a tension not only for Sonal and Preeti, but also for Kiran. She confesses that she managed her relationship with an old and erratic man like Hasmukh, only for the money Preeti, a caring daughter – in – law also turns out to be a passionate desirous of money. Sonal discards the authority of Hasmukh with a very derogatory comment – He was like a village buffalo. What did he understand about other people’s feelings. – the reactions of these three women led to a common conclusion that they are not so weak and subjugated as they seems to be the confession of antagonism against male autonomy is a mockery of patriarchal tradition. Dattani’s efforts to let Kiran, Sonal and Preeti speak against the authority of Hasmukh, is not a sentimental defence of Indian feminism. Dattani’s women at the surface survives with in the locale of the family but at mental level, they are capable of evaluate, analyze and reject the irrational patriarchal authority. Preeti and Sonal inspite of their silent acceptance intelligent enough to detect the hidden motives of Hasmukh. Kiran sarcastically reveal that Hasmukh’s own identity was subordinated to her care and protest. She challenges – He is depended on me for everything. He thought he was the decision maker. But I was.he wanted to run his life,like his father had. Hasmukh didn’t really wanted a mistress. He wanted a father, He was in me a woman who would father him : – – man never really grows. ( CP 570 ) Kiran appreciates Ajit who is at last free from the whims of his father to control the lives of others.

The union of Kiran and Sonal, a collective force born out of the long annals of exploitations and suffering, is an effort to abolish sexual colonialism. Their collective voice is a declaration of woman emanicipation against the – Will ‘ of Hasmukh. The play Where There is a Will also follows the patterns of self assertion to self realization. Hasmukh breaks his mask and faces the hash reality with the realization. – HASMUKH – No, I don’t thing I can enter this house. It isn’t mine – – any more. I will permanently on the tamarind tree. ( Laughter at the table ) They are not my family any more. I wish I had never interfered with their lives. They look quite happy together. With Kiran sitting in my place. Oh , I wish I had been more – – I wish I had lived ( Exits ) – (CP 515 ) To use stage with the delight of a comic artist with precisely a serious thought, is the real strength of Dattani’s dramatic art in – Where There is a Will. ‘ the humour is sustained with the subtle sense of the realization of the intricacy of human nature with in the family as a unit. The – Will ‘ more than a document assumes the significance of a living character, controlling and guiding the action, stirring the consciousness of other characters and exposing the horrors of parental authority. It is not only a question of Hasmukh’s will but also a realization of the will of other characters. Besides thematic concern, the idea to visualize the consciousness of other characters in the disguise of a Ghost is an exceptional achievement of Dattani and it admits immense possibility in the realm of Indian drama in English

References

1.- No Time for Tragedy quoted in Ronald Hayman, Contemporary Playwrights, London : Heinemann, 1969, p, 95 2.Raina, Sita – A Not on the play – Collected Plays p. 449 3.Gorge. Willimas, Domesticall Duties, London, 1962, p. 18 4.Choudhuri, Asha Kuthari, Mahesh Dattani, p. 83 5.Mody, S. and S.mhatre – Sexual Class in India – BCAS, Vol 7 No 1, 1975 6.Mashesh Dattani – Where There is a Will ‘ in Mahesh Dattani : Collected Plays ( New Delhi, Penguin India, 2000 ) p. 496, 500, 501, 481, 482, 493, 487, 515,